Confessions from the Weight Loss Files

When I get together with my female friends for girls' night out the conversation never fails to turn to our weight and what can be done to keep the pounds off. Someone might share an idea for a low-fat meal they tried that actually didn't taste like cardboard covered in turpentine. Another friend might tells us about the spinning class that whipped her butt the day before yesterday. There's always talk about the frustration of having a junk food eating husband who gobbles down Cheetos and beer on a nightly basis and never gains a pound. Invariably, someone confesses a secret-a weight loss secret-an embarrassing truth about something wacky she did in the name of weight loss.

You're dying to know hear some of those confessions, right? Would you like to eavesdrop on excerpts from some of our conversations? I'll go to my grave denying that I was the one who uttered any of these confessions:

I once had some leftover chocolate birthday cake in my house that I couldn't resist so I threw it in the garbage can in the garage so I wouldn't be tempted to get a fork and eat the frosting off the cake at the top of the kitchen can.

I've thought about doing that too (see above) but knew I WOULD go to the garage to scrape off the part that wasn't touching the other garbage. It ended up down the garbage disposal instead.


Well, since we're relieving our guilt...sometimes to get me through a workout I picture my new svelte self walking into my class reunion and strutting past all the guys who never asked me out in high school.

I put on my tightest pair of jeans whenever I make my favorite dinner for the family-it makes me feel full before I really am.

Once when I was having a sugar craving I made a box of sugar-free cherry Jell-o and ate the entire thing while my kids were at school.

I try to burn extra calories by cleaning my house as fast as I can. Dust is flying!

I do that too (see above) but I wear ankle weights when I do it.

When a lady at work insisted that I try her homemade chocolate chip cookies I took three, wrapped them in a napkin and threw them in the trash as soon as she walked out of my office.

When I'm home alone I wear a belt around my waist to remind me to hold in my stomach muscles.

I've convinced myself that if I constantly bob my foot up and down while watching television I'll burn a few calories.


I might not eat an entire box of Jell-o in a single sitting, but the other confessions are fairly harmless, a little off the wall, but basically harmless.

Two of those confessions are mine, can you guess which ones?